Burning Bridges
by CJ7
Summary: This is the final story with Sunny, Darry, Soda and Pony. It's a known saying that history repeats self, but this time Johnny isn't here to be the target. Tulsa's streets are worse than ever. Sometimes, there is only one way out. Chapter is fixed.
1. Rocks, Windows

A/N I guess I wasn't fully ready to end the story. I hope you guys like it! I have no clue why my punctuation disappeared, but here it is re done! Oh and the Outsiders are not mine!

"I'm sorry." Steve said.

"Yeah. You can't tell anyone about it. We don't want the state finding out about it." I stepped back to admire the wax job we had just done on the car. I just got done pouring out everything about how Sunny had left, and why.

Steve followed in the same suit. I had only been talking to him at work, and the only things we talked about were work, and girls. However, when I got grounded for smoking, I picked up a few extra shifts at the DX. I needed human contact and being locked in my room really sucked.

I grinned. "Looks pretty good."

"Yeah. It does." He said.

I walked over to the sink and started washing my hands. "How's Evie?" I knew it was easier to keep the conversation going, the deal with the awkward silence.

"I wouldn't know. We broke up three weeks ago." Steve said. I could tell he was really upset about it.

He was there for me the entire time when Sandy crushed me. "What happened?"

"She cheated on me. She invited me over when her parents were out of town. Stupid broad, had another guy over, she forgot we shut down at nine on Fridays not ten."

"I'm sorry that really blows."

"You're telling me." He said.

"Come pick Ponyboy up with me, we can scope out the cheerleaders." Steve an I fought twice before, once when we were twelve, and a little while ago when he called Darry all brawn. But every fight we had was put to an end with one of us inviting the other to come pick up girls.

Steve grinned. "Let's lock up early, maybe we can watch them run a few drills."

"Sounds good too me!" I said. I knew for us at least things would fall back to normal.

* * *

"Are you guys still talking about the cheerleaders? "I mean seriously half of them aren't that cute, believe me. I've seen them with out their make up."

Steve and I looked up from our spot on the couch. "Well, we know he is looking." Steve said.

"I thought you, you were kind of dating that one." I asked.

"I took her out once. I was supposed to walk her home but her Dad realized I was the greaser kid in Bob's murder." He shifted from side to side awkwardly. "I'm trying to study, so can you keep it down maybe?"

"Sure, and you had nothing to do with Bob." I answered. "Pony what uniform do you think will make the girls go crazy over, the Navy's, Marines or Army?" I held up a pamphlet from each of the forces.

"What about the air force?" He asked, raising his eyebrow at me. "I thought you were a hippie?"

Steve laughed. "He doesn't even like drinking all the much. I don't think he could smoke pot all day."

"I like some of the stuff they do. I mean I am a greaser after all. Just answer the question Pony."

"Dad was in the Navy. Mom always did say he looked cute in his uniform. Why don't you ask a girl?" Pony said disappearing down the hallway. "And shut up. I need to study."

* * *

"What the hell?" I threw my covers back and rolled out of bed. Was one night's sleep impossible to ask for? Three nights ago someone had toilet papered our yard. A mustang was half way out down the block when we got outside. The night after Sunny left. The word "Murderer" was spray painted on our door. Tonight something broke. I figured Steve might have just broken something going to the bathroom, or Two-Bit wondered in drunk.

When I opened my door I heard noises coming from my brothers' room. "What's going on here guys?" I asked, I couldn't help but be a little angry. Three o'clock in the morning if they were going to sleep, they could at least let me. That all quickly changed when I saw Pony covered in glass.

"Turn the light on!" Soda hissed.

"Ponyboy." I rushed over to his side. "Stay there! Soda, there is glass everywhere."

"My knee kills." Pony groaned.

I grabbed Soda's flip-flops so I wouldn't cut my feet on glass. They were too small but they worked at least.

I picked the rock up that had been thrown threw the window. I silently thanked God; it hit Pony's knee and not his head.

"Are you okay?" Steve who had probably been woken up from commotion was standing at the door. "Maybe you should call the pigs."

"Yeah, call them." I said. I leaned down and picked Ponyboy up. I put him down where there wasn't glass. "Can you put weight on it?"

Pony nodded, I could tell it hurt, but it clearly wasn't broken.

The police didn't do anything. They seemed more annoyed that I had called them. People were targeting Pony. I couldn't figure out why nearly a year after everything with Johnny, Dallas and Bob why now. He seemed like he was in a good place, then all the sudden parents didn't want their kids near him, people were calling him a murderer.

"Who hates you, kid?" Steve asked once the fuzz was gone.

I handed Pony an aspirin bottle. "Who doesn't" He replied.

"Maybe you should quit the team." Steve said. "I mean things are just getting heated with the socs again. They may dress like hippies but they ain't, not to mention the gangs."

"I'm not involved with a gang. I'm good at football. I can't help it that it was Bob's sport, I can't help that I play the same position as he did. People seem to forget that he nearly drowned me."

"You ain't going to quit either. Between, football, track and your grades, there is no way college will turn you down for a scholarship." I said.

"Let's ambush them. We can stay up every night until they come back and when they do, we can crush them." Soda shook his fist in the air.

I laughed. " I don't think so little buddy. We'll call the fuzz back. We can't have fights breaking out on my property."

"Fine, then Steve and I will wait up, and when they come back, we'll get their cars."

* * *

"What'd he do now?" I asked. I watched my brother and two other guys running suicides with weights, my stomach turned at that old punishment the Coach would make us do when we were in trouble.

"Shoving match, with two boys in the locker room."

I watched as number 16 stopped running and threw up on the field.

"Jackson, shower and go home." He shouted. "You know never in my life did I ever think I would find someone as half as stubborn as you were, Darrel"

"I've heard he takes after me in that department." I grinned. "I'll have a talk with him."

"Don't, let him be like you. Miller go home! Pony's on the slow side today."

"His knee might still be swollen." I explained.

Coach looked at my quizzically. "What do you mean?"

I went into full explanation about, the past few days and then how last night someone had thrown a rock through the window. "He's a tough kid."

"A little too tough. Ponyboy, come on in son." It was well known after you left the team, that coaches bark was louder than his bite. "He didn't tell me he got hurt."

Pony's pace slowed as he neared us. His jaw was locked tight. Unless you knew him, you wouldn't have known how much pain he was really in.

"Take a seat, son." Coach Carter added. I watched as he scrunched Pony's football gear up.

His knee was twice the size it was the day before, and it was black and blue. Coach Carter shook his head. "This could cost you playing in the game Saturday. Why the heck didn't you mention anything to me?"

"It didn't hurt." Pony said. It scared me how good of a liar he could be.

"That was a stupid move, Ponyboy." I said even if I was secretly impressed that he out ran the other guys even with a bad knew.

"I'm still going to play aren't I?" Pony asked as he glared up at me. The kid was smart. I guess he figured I was the one who said something.

"It's not broken. You can't practice this week. We'll have to start running Jackson. Go home, rest it, and ice it a couple times a day. We'll see how it looks Saturday"

He wasn't happy about that news. Then again neither would I have been if I were in his shoes. Pony gave me the silent treatment all the way home. I was about to say something to him, but I over heard the conversation in the kitchen, between Soda and Maria.

"Which uniform?" Soda asked. He had all these military pamphlets spread out on the table."

"You can't choose a career based on the uniform." Maria mused

I watched as a sly grin spread across his face. I knew that grin; some type of adult content would follow it. I put my hands over Pony's ears just time for him to say. "The job is the fun part, the uniform is just the benefit. I know there is a reason you don't change out of your nurses uniform when you come here after work."

Maria blushed and Pony pried my hands off his ears. "Either Marines or Army." She answered

"Maria, will you look at my knee."

"What about the Navy?" Soda asked. "My Dad was in the Navy."

"I'm not a fan on men in white pants." She said getting on her tip toes and kissing my cheek. "But black jeans, are another story." She whispered in my ear.

It was moments like that where I was happy that my ears didn't go red like Pony's. I watched as she examined Pony's knee. "Have you taken anything for it?"

"No." Pony answered. "We are out of aspirin."

She pulled a bottle of Ibuprofen out of her pure. "How much do you weight?" She slid a few pillows under his leg to elevate it.

Pony fell silent. He had grown a few inches, but his weight hadn't caught up yet. It was making people talk. He was a greaser, and the kid who was second string, was probably just as good as Pony, but Pony was faster. When Coach gave him the spot and not the soc boy, people were looking for just about any reason, to get the greaser off the football team.

"How much?" I pressed.

He looked down at his hands. "One o five."

Maria looked up at me. I could tell she wanted to say something, but she wasn't going to do it. Things were still at odds with her when it came time to Ponyboy. I knew she was thinking, that the average on his team was probably one fifty or more. She was thinking that if the wrong guy tackled him, every bone in his body would be crushed. I was thinking it too.

"You eat everything in sight. How have you not put on a few pounds?" I asked.

Pony shrugged. His ears were going red. "I guess because Sunny always cooked healthy."

I hated Sunny's cooking. It just didn't have taste to me. He put vegetables in everything. Despite what most people think, I hate vegetables. "We're going back to our southern, fried, soul food."

By the time Saturday rolled around, the temperature outside had dropped. I was crammed on the freezing cold bleachers with Steve and Soda who were hitting on every girl in sigh. I sat waiting to find out if Pony was actually going to play.

"Where is Two-Bit?" Steve asked.

Soda squirmed around to keep warm. "I don't know. He must have found a girl or two."

"Hi Darry." That was a voice I hadn't heard since the rumble.

I looked up, sure enough it was just who I thought. "Hi, Paul."

"I heard Pony's been following in your footsteps." He grinned. "It sucks about his knee, maybe that is why string beans shouldn't play football." He tugged on his college jacket that he was wearing.

I felt something inside me ignite. I gripped the bleachers, so I wouldn't strangle him. "How'd you know about his knee?"

"My cousin is his replacement." Paul turned around and sat down. I heard him mumble. "The one who should be playing anyway."

I could hardly believe we were friends at one point in time. I heard through the grapevine that I had broken his nose in the rumble. He had to even get some surgery on it. I was sorry then, I almost thought about telling him that. That wasn't the case any more. I couldn't wait until I had the chance to do it again. The announcer came on the speaker.

"Our starting line up, number thirteen Ponyboy Curtis."

Steve and Soda burst out in hysterics. "Better luck next year soc."

I leaned down. "Brings back old memories doesn't it? You always wanted to be quarter back. I guess string bean, is a lot tougher than he looks."


	2. Gangs and girls

"Darry, make him stop." I groaned and put my hands over my ears.

Soda had found a love of country music. I wasn't sure why or how. Now Hank and Johnny Cash blared through out our house at any given time. That wasn't what was bad, what was bad was, he now played country music for school. He practiced all day, and he sung too. He actually had a good voice, but the country music just wasn't mine, or Darry's thing. Since, he had been grounded, my house sounded like cowboy's stomping ground.

Darry rubbed his temples. He picked up some extra shifts since Sunny left. He was really tired. "Soda!"

Soda emerged from our room. He had a white cowboy hat on, boots and his white shirt. I started laughing at the sight of him. Darry couldn't even help but crack a smile. "What?" Soda asked. "Hey, I play better when I get into character!"

Darry threw a pillow at his head. "One, where are your pants, little man? Two, put the guitar down and work on something else. Preferably some math?"

Soda went down the hall in a huff. The phone rang. Darry reached over and answered it.

I tried to return back to my biology book, but when I heard him say. "Where are you and when are you coming back? I can't deal with Soda's and homework duty much longer." I knew it was Sunny. There was a pause and all the sudden Darry said. "Country music." It was followed by. "No, I'm not sure he is the product of my parents." I listened as he talked about all the things that have been going on.

"Here, Pony." Darry held the phone out for as long as it would stretch.

I grabbed, taking a seat on the arm of the chair. "Hi, Sunny."

"Hey, Baby." His voice sounded like all his energy had been drained from him. He sounded sick. "How is the knee? You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I am okay." I answered. He only asked a few more questions about school, and about football. Then he wanted to talk to Soda.

Soda grabbed the phone from me. "Hi." He said happily.

I watched Soda grin. "Yes, country music. I just like it. It has feeling."

Soda hung the phone up. "He had to go. He says he loves ya'll. He don't sound too good."

"Yeah, I think this week was the hardest." Darry said. "Get back to your homework guys."

* * *

"Got, time for one more?" Curley Sheppard came running into DX. He picked up a coke, and tossed down a few dimes.

Steve grabbed the change and threw it in the register. "Turn the sign around."

I flipped our sign to close, and started counting the cash in the registar.

Curley hopped up on the counter drinking the coke. "What are you guys getting into tonight?"

"We're going down to the ribbon. We got to meet some girls." I said.

"Can ya, give me a ride?" He asked "I thought Daddy Darry, had you on lock down. What happened to Sunny?"

"He did until I played too much country music. Sunny is visiting relatives." I answered. That was what we agreed to say if anyone asked about Sunny.

"Country music?" Curley said disgusted. "You are lame."

I wanted to tell him he was a lazy ass, but six men came walking in the gas station. I quickly recognized a few of them. They were part of the Timber Street Tigers. "Hey guys, the sign says were closed. We are shut down for the night."

A guy with a beard grabbed the sign from the door. "What sign?" He asked tearing it in half.

"We are closed; and we don't want trouble." Steve said. He had been mopping the floor, until they came inside. "So, you can leave, we can't give you any service."

Curley took the last swallow if his coke, he busted the bottle on the edge of the counter. It was stupid move we were out numbered. These guys were all carrying heat too.

Two of them pulled out guns. "Don't move." He said. "You get behind the counter." The gun kept his gun pointed at Steve until he was behind the counter.

Steve did as the bearded guy told him too. "Hands in the air." He ordered, while a red headed one pushed Curley over the counter.

They all laughed as Curley picked himself off the floor. He brushed the dirt off himself. I watched him draw his mouth tight so he wouldn't say anything stupid.

"Okay boys, we can do this the easy or the hard way." The bearded guy put his gun to my head. "One wrong move, one little move, and I'll blow your brains out."

* * *

I took my eyes off Maria. She had been brushing her hair, so it would look like it did before we came into my bedroom. I glanced over at the clock. There was a chance that Soda would come home, and change before going out tonight. Which meant I had to start getting dressed. I pulled on my gray t-shirt, and went to grab a washcloth to wipe her lipstick of my neck.

"I don't get why you put that on." I said.

Maria finished putting her lipstick on. "Because I like to look pretty for you." There was a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"You always look pretty, even before all the makeup." I tossed the washcloth into hamper.

Maria let a sigh of exasperation. She threw her lipstick in her make up bag.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

She rolled her brown eyes. "Like you haven't noticed."

I was starting to wonder if that time of the month was approaching. I scanned her trying to see if I had missed something like a hair cut or something. She didn't cut her hair though, and her clothes weren't new. "What are you talking about?"

She looked at me from the mirror. "You can't honestly stand there tell me you haven't noticed that I've put on weight. I can only fit in some of my clothes. I had to get a new uniform. All I've been eating for the past few weeks is salad. I've exercised everyday. Nothing has happened. With how gorgeous you are, I'm sure the last thing you want is a fat girlfriend on your arm."

Women are too complicated. If there was one life lesson that was going to stick with me; sit was that girls were going to be as confusing to me as they were when I was thirteen until the day I died. "Maria, I mean this in the most loving way, but are you off your damn rocker?"

Her jaw dropped wide open and her eyes got wide too. She was so close to crying but looked so cute. The phone started ringing. I could tell she expected me to run out and get it. I couldn't help smile. "I can't take my eyes or my hands off you. You're beautiful. Incase you haven't noticed I'm over six feet and weight well over two hundred pounds. I'd break you if you get any thinner. I get that you want to look like the Twiggy person on your magazines, but I'm happy you don't look like that. She looks like she is twelve year old boy. She has no hips boobs or butt. If you want to look like a tooth pick that is your idea, not mine. I like you the way you are. Honestly, if you looked like her, you'd be loosing what physically attracted me to you in the first place."

"Are you being honest?" She asked.

"Yes." I answered. "If you promise not to hit me. I'll tell you a secret."

"I promise." Maria said slowly.

"When I was in the hospital I made believe that I couldn't lift up my hand so you would have to come close to me. You know to change the bandages. Then jokingly Sunny suggested that I should start dropping things on the ground so you would have to bend over and pick them up." I felt my self blush. I smiled sheepishly. "You know to look at all the goods."

She put her tan hands on her hips. "Are you serious? And I thought you were classy."

"That's why my wallet was on the ground everyday when you came into my room. You're going to hit me aren't you?" I asked. The phone was still ringing off the hook. How she answered that question would depend on if I actually answered the phone.

Maria started tying all her hair back. "Oh yeah."

"Well I have to answer the phone first." I said taking off running.

I managed to grab the receiver before she could attack. "Hello."

"This is the Tulsa Hospital. Is Darrel Curtis there?"

I felt my stomach plummet. The last time they called Pony was in there. "This is him."

"We have your brother Sodapop Curtis." She said his name carefully. As if it were some kind of joke.

"Is he okay?" I asked. Maria realized that something was wrong. She laid her hand gently on my ribcage.

"You're going to have to come here." The lady at the other end said. "Report to the childcare floor. It's the fourth floor."


	3. alone

"You okay?" I asked approaching the room that Soda was in.

"Besides having a huge headache?" Soda asked. "Where are Steve and Curley?"

"Curley took off, didn't want to talk to the police. Steve is outside smoking. What happened Sodapop?"

"I have no clue. I did everything the guy asked. Then BOOM!" He clapped his hands together and winced. I felt like I got hit in the head with a pile of bricks, and everything went black." Soda fiddled with the frays off his shirts. "He held his gun right where he hit. For a second I thought I was going to die. Guess I'm lucky I just got pistol whipped."

There was a certain eerie tone to Soda's voice. He was a lot more shaken up over this than he lead on. He was okay thou. He had a headache and a huge stitches. Tomorrow this would be a memory. For me this would be etched in my brain.

Waking him up every hour on the hour was the doctor's instructions. I was happy I didn't have to work in the morning, because in order for me to wake up, I had to stay awake. I threw the last of my coffee in the filter.

"I can take over if you want?" Pony offered. He had fallen asleep in the couch around two thirty.

"Nah. I probably wouldn't sleep much anyways." I turned around to look at my youngest brother. "I thought you were out cold. Did I wake you up?"

He was pacing around the kitchen. "No, my legs keep like cramping or something he said. The only way I can get it to stop is to walk around. It's been happening for a few weeks." He started kicking his legs into the air. "Not to mention, I'm starving."

"You've got growing pains." I snickered when he shot me a look that pretty much said I was a moron. "I'm serious. I had them too for a while. Then I woke up one day my feet were huge."

Pony stopped kicking the air and stared down at his feet. "That's wonderful to know."

"Want a grilled cheese?" I asked taking out the butter and cheese.

"Sure." He plopped down still staring at his feet. "That won't hurt my track season will it?"

"Do you remember that summer Soda broke four bones?" I asked but I didn't wait until he answered. "He was in a growth spurt then."

I glanced over at him as I threw a sandwich on a skillet. He was still starring at his feet. I immediately regretted saying anything like that. He started hitting puberty a short while ago. Lucky for him he was just grew a few inches. He started to take notice to girls, but for right football and school is what he lived and breathed for. I put a plate and his food in front of him and then rubbed the top of his hair. For now he wasn't awkward.

"I can't afford for to break anything." Pony finally said.

"Kid, you're doing just fine. You're a lot more graceful on your feet than Soda or I. You're just becoming a man." Even I cringed at that phrase. God, I was awful with words. I wished more than ever that Sunny were here. He was a lot better with words and explaining stuff. It was getting close to having to have that infamous talk with Pony.

Ponyboy just shook his head at me. "Think I should lift weights. You and Sunny put that weight bench up in the garage."

"No, don't even go near that. Not until you voice changes it will stunt your growth plate." I warned.

"How?" Pony asked.

"I don't know. It just does." I answered honestly.

* * *

"What do you want out of this?" Tom asked after fifteen minutes of silence. He shifted around in his leather chair. The chair made a strange sound underneath it; kind of almost like it was the dead animal it once was.

"I want to go home and live semi normally." I answered. I hated this talk therapy crap. I didn't trust strangers. I'd go to group therapy, anger classes and even the alcoholic classes. I'd draw all that they wanted me too and write. However sitting in an office while an abnormally fat man tried to make some explanation of my feelings. I had been at this place for two weeks. The first week was the detoxify week. I threw up constantly, and my entire body shook violently. I wasn't allowed to smoke that week, my entire body hurt. My head still hurt daily, but my hands stopped shaking.

"Are you ready to talk about the war?" He asked.

I shook my head. "No." I wasn't sure if I was ever going to be ready to talk about that part of my life.

"You understand that just because you ignore it verbally, doesn't mean it can be ignored mentally. Why don't you write about it; when you are ready we can read it."

I nodded in agreement. "So what do we talk about now?" I asked.

He looked down at his papers. "We talked about your family in California. How about your brothers?"

"They are chaotic. The youngest two can literally drive a person to a heat attack." I stopped. I felt my lips curve into a smile for the first time in two weeks. "They are amazing and inspirational."

"When you say home; do you mean Tulsa?"

"Yeah. I can't go home. They don't deserve to have to deal with my problems. They already had too." I eyed the tissues on his desk. At some point here you cry. I wasn't there yet.

"That's the part of raising children, especially those like your brothers. Problems like the ones you have reflect on those of your brothers. See children grow up to be like the people that raised them. Well in many cases." Tom was the psychologist or psychiatrist or what ever the correct name was. To me he was an over weight man with beady eyes who pried into my life. I hated talking to strangers especially about feelings.

"I'm well aware of the nature versus nurture argument." I said sitting back into my chair. I could tell this was going to be one of the longest hours in my life.

* * *

I was standing at the lockers after gym class. My towel was wrapped around my waist. I hated this part of the day. I hated that I had to change in front of people. Usually, I did my hair and by the time everyone was finished changing and out is when I were only two greasers in my gym class me and Nick. Nick is boarder line hood, he was like a mild version of Dallas Winston. He was always in an out of trouble with the police. He came into art class stoned everyday, but he had tried every drug in the book. This was the socs time to gang up on me. I started putting grease on my hair.

"I'm surprised your football helmet stays on with all the grease." Jackson wanted my position on the team. He was second string. It was supposed to have my spot, but I could out run him any day of the weak.

Jackson wasn't staring at me, but I was looking through mirror, and I saw him and five others in a circle. I caught Nick's gaze, he moved his hand, and I saw his blade on him.

"I'm surprised you can even fit your fat in head in yours." I mumbled.

"Watch it grease." A different soc walked close to me. "I hear you and water don't get along very well." He was friends with one of the guys who tried to drown me the night Johnny killed Bob. "Don't worry grease. I'll make sure you get your hair washed real good before you go to hell for murder."

I threw extra grease in my hair, and turned to face him. He was bigger than me and I had to admit; I was afraid of him but I couldn't show that.

"Hurry it up." Coach Carter threw open the door. "Ya'll aren't a bunch of ladies so do your business and go to class. Curtis quit fixing your hair, and put your clothes on."

When I was lying in bed that night I wished that Soda and I still shared a bed. The socs threats were a normal thing but they were slowly getting worse. I knew how Johnny felt now, and it wasn't a pleasant feeling. Darry had rearranged our furniture after the rock came through the window. I couldn't even concentrate on Soda snoring. Those threats were echoing in my head. I couldn't believe that Johnny had the guts to sleep outside by himself on these days. I wasn't sure when I fell asleep, but the next thing I knew I had just came out of my dream world.

"Whoa, easy Pony." Soda said. I nearly bucked him in the head when I sat up in my bed.

"Turn the lights on." I said. I could feel the tears on my cheeks already.

The lights came on but it was Darry because Soda hadn't moved from my bed. "What happened?"

"One of those dreams." Soda explained. "Well I think. What happened Pony?"

I brushed him off when he went to hug me. I wasn't ready to deal with these dreams again. I didn't want too loose sleep. I was overwhelmed.

"It's okay." Soda said. He tried to put a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't touch me." I snapped at him. I didn't mean to do that. I pulled my knees up and buried my face in them. I hated this. I felt like a little kid.

"You have to tell us what you want." Soda said.

"Give him some air, little buddy." Darry said. "Go get him some water."

"Ponyboy draw your breath in and count to ten." Darry ordered. "Don't it Pony."

I did what he told me. It didn't fully work but it calmed me down enough. Soda handed me the class of water.

"What happened?" He asked.

I just shrugged. Soda sat next to me and threw his arm around me. "Well it's over now."

* * *

The past few days had nearly gave me a heart attack. I hadn't even slept yet. First the rock incident that kept me up. Next came Soda getting robbed at work. Then Pony got suspended for two days. He had gotten into a fist fight with some soc. Suspension meant he couldn't play this week. This past month's events had built up one heated visit from the state. They checked my house up and down. Of course it wasn't clean. They then questioned my brothers. It didn't help that Sunny was "visiting" relatives, and I didn't have the number to get a hold of him. The worst is they questioned each one of my brothers until they were crying. It was like they needed to co horse them into admitting something. I stirred the pot of mushroom soup.

"It's ready?" I said to Maria. She was sitting on the couch with her head between her legs. That was the other thing; my girlfriend was puking her guts up for the past couple of days.

"Maybe you should see a doctor." I said sitting next to her with a bowl of soup.

She pinched her nose. "Darry, I can't take that smell right now." Maria she turned away from my soup like it was the plague in a bowl.

"Have you drank anything?" I asked.

"Yeah. I'm sorry." She said. "You look horrible."

"Thanks." I mumbled. Nothing like hearing that come out of your girlfriends mouth.

She put a tan hand on my knee. "You know what I meant. I feel bad it's all about me. You just had a bad day or days."

"I'm just tired, and I don't get why it's my family that has to go through hell." I rubbed my face.

"Do you miss Sunny?"

I twiddled with my thumbs. "Yes, because we could be at your place right now. I wouldn't be babysitting Ponyboy, while Soda is at a show."

Maria started tying her hair up."I don't mind being here. I just feel bad you have to see me like this. That isn't the reason you miss Sunny."

She had her way of just pulling things out of me. "I don't want to deal with this alone." I said.


	4. no matter what

"Where are you taking us?" Steve shouted over the noise of the first band. "We lost Two-Bit."

"Where did he go?" I shouted trying to squeeze in between two guys in flannel shirts.

Steve tugged on my shirt and pointed back to the bar. Two-Bit had a beer and a glass of something else, and was sitting next to a blonde with her hair braided and very short shorts. I could tell she was a lot older than us.

"Hey. I am going to get a beer. Do you want one?" Steve shouted. He knew I would say no, but he always offered.

"How come I've never seen you before?" A girl with black hair stood in front of me. She had a black shirt on with boots and a skirt.

I grinned. "I could say the same about you." I shoved my hands in my pockets. I didn't have a fake id like Two-Bit or Steve. So when I entered the club, since I was only seventeen they put a giant X on each of my hands. That way, the bartenders could tell I was underage.

"I'm the beer girl." I must have looked at her like I was stupid because she immediately said. "I work here. I get people their drinks when they are too lazy to walk to the bar or want to dance around."

"I see. It is my first time here. I just came to see the Tennessee Three. I had friends but they are more interested in the bar." I jerked my thumb toward Steve and Two-Bit.

She laughed a little. "What's your name?"

"Sodapop"

She looked at me funny. "Do you want whiskey in there?"

It was my turn to laugh. "No ma'am. I don't drink. Sodapop is my name." I stuck my hand out. "Sodapop Curtis.

She blushed with embarrassment. "My name is Becky. Do me a favor don't ever call me ma'am. Do I look like your Mama or something?"

"No and I am very happy you aint."

"Enjoy the show. Let me know when I can get you a real soda." She winked at me. I watched her walk away. I had a feeling I would be buying a lot of cokes.

I must say despite the fact that I now reeked of smoke and whiskey We had a good night. Two-Bit found a woman, and who believed his story that we was related to Jesse James. Steve was dancing with some blonde all night. Becky had written her number on my stomach. I won't get into why or how. The little honkey tonk bar turned out to be a good night.

"I need to go for the older crowd more often. Hell she bought me the drinks!" Two-Bit slurred.

My attempt to do a double back hand spring failed. Boy was as sugared up as he was drunk. That was a lot too.

"I think she had to have beer goggles on." Steve said. "What are they doing here?"

"They were in the bar. They must be looking for a fight." Two-Bit replied.

There were four socs sitting on the hood of my car. "Ya'll got blades?" I asked. I could tell from here they were drunk. "I don't got one."

"Yeah." They both said at the same time.

We approached the socs. "This ain't a taxi. So get off my truck." I warned. I was ready for what ever they wanted to throw at us.

The dark headed soc looked over at the big blond one. "Ya hear that Ben? We're both wrong. This heap of junk is actually an operating vehicle. See I thought this was scrap metal." He smiled and jumped off the car. "Ben thought it was garbage because it smelled so bad. Guess we know why it smells so bad."

"My guess is because you, and those cows have been sitting on it."

"Ya'll looking for a fight? Or do you just want to square dance all night?" Two-Bit asked through his teeth.

I was on sugar high. I was happy from getting a new girls number and seeing the Tennessee Three. Man would I ever enjoy this fight.

"Oh we have plans to take you all out. Two at a time." It was a reference to Johnny and Dally. The fight was on. There was no way they were going to win.

* * *

"What are they singing?" Maria asked looking over at me.

I couldn't help but grin. "That would be the grease theme song. It sounds like they stomped some socs."

The door flung open, and in three stooges fashion Soda, Steve and Two-Bit came piling in. "Hi ya Darry!"

I cocked my eyebrow. Have a good night?"

"Oh yeah! We all met girls. Then some socs tried to start some crap in the parking lot, and we chased them to Mexico!" Soda picked himself up. "Maria can you do a handstand?"

"No." She answered watching him do one.

"You be careful with those stitches little man. Soda what is on your stomach?" I asked taking notice to something written just below his belly button.

Soda flipped over on his back. "That is Becky's number. She is the server." He started dancing.

I didn't want to know why or how the number was written there. "Is he drunk?" I asked Steve.

Steve shook his head. "No, he only drank about fifteen Cokes."

I looked over at Soda who was not trying to stand on his head. I shook my head. "Good lord." I pushed his legs back forcing him to tumble on the floor.

"Thanks Darry." He mumbled. "Where is Pony?" He jumped up off the floor and ran down the hall. Seconds later I heard screaming and thuds. Soda reappeared dragging my shirtless youngest brother.

"He was sleeping and it's only one! Come on Ponyboy. We are getting a game of poker going." Soda said.

"Get off me!" He grabbed Soda by the arms and smashed him between the wall and the floor. It didn't even look like he had to try that hard.

I couldn't help but grin as they started smacking each other and rolling around on the floor. I watched Pony body slam Soda. "Darry help!" Soda called trying to get out of Pony's headlock.

"No way. You knew better than to wake the grizzly bear up." I said.

Soda used Pony's weakness. He started poking at his ribs and then tickling him.

"You two are nuts." I said pulling apart. Life with these two was never boring, that was for sure.

* * *

It had been a late night at work. I wanted to shower right now more than anything in the entire world. I took notice to the fact that my truck was missing. Damn it, Soda. He wasn't supposed to be going out everywhere on school nights. Pony had better be home with his homework done.

"Holy shit!" I screamed despite the fact no one could hear me. There was a small fire in front of the front door. I knew what it was as I stepped out of the car because of the smell. I grabbed the hose immediately, and sprayed the bag that was engulfed in flames.

Pony must have heard all the noise because the door flung open. "Why didn't you put this out. Did they not do the knock and run?" I asked scanning the rest of the porch to make sure nothing was on fire. "The entire house could have caught fire."

Ponyboy just shrugged. "I didn't feel like answering the door."

I wanted to slap him upside his head. "Ponyboy Michael the entire house could have burned down; all because you didn't feel like answering the door!" Why did he insist on being so dang stupid at times.

"We'll next time I'll answer, and the socs can just set me on fire instead of your stupid house." He ripped a giant piece of paper off the door and threw it into the ashes. Then he ran back into his house and I heard the door slam to his room.

I grabbed my work gloves out of my toolbox and grabbed the note. "Pony, where is your brother?" I asked not believing how much I could sound like my parents.

I heard the door open. "That had to be socs." He said appearing back in the kitchen.

"It was I saw the white mustang as I was coming home." I threw the note in the garbage. "It says this is what he think of you grease balls."

"He took some Becky girl out. It was meant for me." Pony's voice was just above a whisper.

I laughed; which wasn't the reaction he wanted. "Two-Bit used to go to soc land, pick a house, and light a bag of dog crap on fire. It was geared to our entire family."

"That's what you think." He said simply and walked down the hall.

I needed Soda to be here. Pony wasn't sleeping well at all. Now he was jumpy all the time. I knew the flaming dog crap was meant for him. The socs were just hitting below the gut. They knew they could upset him.

* * *

This week couldn't get any worse. The coach put Jackson in the game because the tackle to the other team weighed more than a hundred pounds over me. He actually did decent too. Then there was the flaming dog crap. Everytime I went to try to sleep I heard the socs voices in my head.

"Hi. Ponyboy." Kathy said. She was a girl I had crushed on for a while. She was Bryon's ex girlfriend. She was real classy and sweet. We had been a few dates. I hadn't told the gang yet. I wasn't ready for their jokes and I wasn't ready for what ever Darry had in store to tell me about growing up and girls.

I smiled at her. "Hi."

"We have to talk. I really like you." She began. I knew this wasn't going to be good. "I know what people say about you isn't true."

"Where is this going?" I asked bluntly. I started chewing on my nail. I picked a spot down our hall to concentrate on. Did this count as my first time being dumped?

"I just can't see you anymore." She said tossing her hair over her shoulder. "The socs and the fights. I don't want to be involved."

"I understand. I'll see you around." She walked away when I opened my locker to ignore her.

There was a folded up piece of paper. It was a ripped out page from the yearbook. They had highlighted the place where the put Johnny Cade's name. They drew an arrow to the blank spot where his picture was. He was gone when it came time for year book photos, but they still had put his name in there. There was a side note. _This will be you next year grease._

_

* * *

_

"Darry!" The foreman tapped me on the shoulder.

I turned around. What more could this guy want from me. I was already working extra hours. I missed Pony's game because we had no supervisor. I had been acting supervisor. I hoped it would maybe get me a permanent position.

"Umm. Your little brother is at the hospital. You need to get down there. They said he took a beating."

God lord, Sunny was going to tan my ass this time. He had warned me about Pony getting hurt. "He break some ribs in the game?" I asked. The only thing

"No, his coach found him in the locker room on the floor." He wasn't looking at me. He knew all about my relationship with my brothers.

I felt my heart stop. I thought I was going to fall of the roof. I made it to the hospital as fast as I could.

"Where is he?" I asked when I saw Coach Carter standing with guys. "What happened?"

"Darry, he looks worse than Johnny." Soda threw himself into my crying.

"What do you mean?" I asked. "What happened? Did he get hurt at practice?"

"Darry, we don't know. I went to check the lockers rooms after the practice today when I heard the shower going. I found Pony in there. He was just in a pool of blood." Coach Carter explained. "I have the police questioning the football team. I'm sorry. They know his ribs are broken. He had a giant gash behind his head."

"Are you Darrel Curtis?" A doctor pushed his way through Steve and Two-Bit. He didn't wait until I nodded. "You're little brother isn't in good condition. He had about fifty stitches in his head alone. His ribs are broken. He is a lucky kid. They all just barely missed puncturing his lungs. He is cut up a little bit. His arms and neck are the main target. His shoulder got ripped out of socket. Walk with me; I'll show you to his room. They have to stay." He gestured toward the guys.

I followed him down the hall. They had buzzed Pony's hair. His head was covered in bandages. I could tell his ribs were wrapped up even from under the hospital grown. There was a gash on his eyebrow above his right eye. The left side of his face had a scrape from his ear to his chin. His left arm was in a sling. There was a swarm of bruises all over him not to mention the cuts.

"He has to stay up. If that head injury happened first he would have blacked out. He wouldn't have felt anything. He does now. I'm really worried about internal inflammation, and his head. I'll give you a few minutes."

I sat on the edge of his bed. "Hey." I said gently. Pony didn't look at me.

"Iwanttogohome." He spat out everything jumbled. He lip was so swollen.

"You can't just yet. What happened, Baby?"

His eyes were blank. There was no innocence or sparkle. They were blank and scared. The same way Johnny looked after he got beat up. I swore that look would never come across one of my brother's faces. I couldn't believe I let that happen. They had made minced meat out of my baby brother."

"I don't know. They slammed my head before I could see them."

"I'm sorry. I should have been there." I said.

Pony looked at me for the first time. "Two-Bit, Soda, and Steve were waiting. Coach Carter was down the hall. This was going to happen, if you were there or not."


	5. Visitors

"Thanks." I said taking the drinks out of Maria's hands.

"I got you some coffee. How is he?" She was still in her uniform. "Why are you out here?"

Ponyboy's ribs and head were really bad. We were going to have to stay until he could breath normally. "Not good." I looked in the window of his room. Soda was sitting on his bed. They were watching some TV movie. "Soda's been trying for the last hour to get him to smile. Soda can't even get one out of him."

"Maybe you should go in there." Maria tried again.

"I don't know what to say to him."

She wrapped her arms around me. "He has no clue who did it?"

"No, he said he might have seen an S tattoo or the guy. But, he blacked out so suddenly. We have nothing. His team knows nothing, his Coach doesn't, and he doesn't. I do know something. I am going to find out who did this to him. And I will make sure that if they live, they will have the look that's on Pony's face right now."

"Come on, let give him his Pepsi." Maria tugged on her sleeve. She wasn't used to the greaser in me.

"Is that what actual blood looks like?" Soda asked staring up at the dark red goop in a bag. He leaned foreword and poked the bag.

Maria laughed. "Yes honey."

That was another thing. He lost so much blood the hospital had to replace it. The told me if no one would have found him

"Don't poke the blood. Here." I handed an open bottle of Pepsi with a straw in it to Pony. "Maria got it for you."

"Thanks." Pony said. He had to completely open his mouth to get the straw in.

"Isn't caffeine worth a little smile?" Soda asked. He frowned when Ponyboy didn't even answer.

* * *

I had come home from the shooting range and tossed my gun in the gun cabinet. Dad always kept it locked up, but I didn't see a reason too. We were all old enough now to get how gun worked. We also knew how to clean them, load and unload them. Something about the shooting range seemed to settle part of my rage. I wasn't sure why. That and the gym; I switched my shirt before heading down to the hospital. When day two came by and the doctor insisted that Pony stay, I started to freak out. He couldn't miss much more school, but then a few cheerleaders started bringing him his class work. However, they weren't allowed pass the nurse's station. Pony didn't want to see anyone from his team or school.

Today, when I wondered down the hall, I concentrated on the floor. I didn't want to accidentally look into another room with a sick kid. It made my stomach churn. I was pulled from my concentration from a stream of curse words. I looked up, there was Tim Sheppard fighting with a nurse.

"What's going on?" I asked. I had a feeling he was here to see us.

Tim glared at the nurse. "This damn broad is trying to tell me I can't see you. I have business with you."

The nurse looked scared shitless. "I'll call security."

"Don't. He's a friend." I said.

She gave me a dirty look. It was like she couldn't belive that I would have any ties with him. Suddenly, I wanted to give her the finger. "What's going on?"

"I heard Pony's in bad shape." He said fishing around in his pockets for a smoke.

"He is in room 302." I watched him light up.

I followed Tim down the hall. There wasn't a single person here today. "The Brumlys and us. We got that gang that robbed the DX. They came down to our side. Curley recognized them. The little bike ridding pussys won't be around here. They at least won't touch our brother's again." He grinned and then his grin stopped when we were outside Pony's window. "Holy shit. He got torn to pieces. He was a good kid."

"I know." I shoved my hand in my pockets. I didn't like his use of the word was either. "He IS a good kid."

"I heard he saw and S tattoo. Before blanked out." Tim ignored my comment.

"He thinks, he isn't sure thou. I want to find out who did it. Why they did it. Then I am going to make the suffer."

"We'll fight their way this time." Tim said. "Eye for eye. It was that gang. The south side socs. That is probably what the S he was stood for. Fucking rich bastards. They think getting tattooed and beating kids up makes them tough."

"Who is in the gang?" I asked. I could feel my blood boil.

Tim turned and faced me. "Past the little high school bitch boys that Pony and Curley got in a fight with the other day, I'm not sure. There could only be one guy who did that." He nodded toward Ponyboy. More than one would have been suspicious walking in and out. We'll find out who. We will take out all of them. I'll let you know the news."

When Tim left I got news that Pony could come home. He could go back to school the following day. I was looking at all the pain medication that we were sent home with when Soda wondered in.

"He is sleeping." Soda sat down at the table. His usual happy go lucky attitude was replaced with a much more serious one.

"Yeah, he is going to probably be doing a lot of that." I pushed the medicine aside. He hadn't even asked for the really strong stuff yet.

"Darry, what are you doing Saturday?" He asked. He shifted around in his seat uncomfortably.

"I don't know. Why?" I asked.

"Look, I am going to do this no matter what. I graduate this summer. If I sign now, they will take me right after graduation." He began. His pep seemed to come back as he spoke.

"What's going on?" I asked trying to keep my voice mono tone.

"Look after I graduate I am going to join the Marines." He said.

Somehow, this didn't surprise me. It made me proud too. "Why?"

"Because Darry. I need to make something of myself. We have a war going on and someone has to fight it. Dad was in the Navy. I'll bring home some nice money. Maybe that will help you out a little more. Incase Sunny doesn't come back. I'm only seventeen. Since I'll be eighteen when I graduate, I can join now. You have to sign a paper. Steve and his old man are going Saturday. If I sign mine then too we'll go to boot camp together. Just so you know, even if you don't sign, I'm still going join. I am going to fight for my country."

Soda always did rally around the American flag. He liked fights, and he had a good shot. Now, he was going to channel all his energy in something good and honorable. I thought about joining the service at one point too, but that and college was just another thing I couldn't do when I got custody of them. I couldn't help but smile. "Sodapop, I'm really proud of you."

He smiled. "Thanks, do you think Mom and Dad would be? I mean Dad was in the Navy."

"Yes!" I answered cutting into his sentence. "They really would be." I wasn't sure if I liked it or not, but Sodapop Curtis had grown up.

* * *

"Sunny, you have a visitor." A nurse or someone popped her head in my room.

I walked down to the visitor quarter. It was a very secure room with couches spread far apart, so people could talk in private. My publisher had came a few times to discuss different things. I just couldn't figure out who would be visiting me. There she was. My Mom was sitting at the table in the far corner. It was the table farthest from anyone else in the room. There were only a few others in here. Now. I hated this room. They set it up to look almost like home, but it was too cookie cutter to home.

"Mom?" I had called my parents house last week, but I only spoke to my sister for a short while.

"Surprised to see me?" She got up and hugged me really fast.

"Yeah, I mean I haven't spoken to since." I stopped. I hadn't spoken to my parents, not since she told me I needed to stop writing anti government articles. I had gone to their house when I was in California for business. I didn't even make it inside. They wouldn't let me.

"What happened?" She asked sitting back down. "Holly told me you were here. I had no clue."

I slid across from her. "I didn't think you guys really cared much. I couldn't get the door slammed in my face faster the last time I came over."

"Shayne." She began. She still called me by my middle name. "Look you father was a solider, and he gave a lot of money to the Republican Party. All the sudden, he has his son writing this anti American propaganda. Then working with some Democrat." She looked at me up and down. "Even Darrel Curtis served in the Navy. I'm surprised your brothers even wanted you."

"They did. I guess that's the difference." I said. I started wondering why she even bothered to come.

"Why are you here? If things got this bad, that you had to check into a place with." She leaned foreword and whispered. "These psychos. You should have came home, we could have scheduled you with your therapists."

I dug my face in my hands. I was getting a headache. "Well let's see. I was probably an alcoholic at like age eighteen. Then I am forced to go to war. I come home, and well I'm just a little bit psycho after everything. So, to control my anger I started smoking pot. To calm my nerves I start drinking even more. I came here to detoxify and get help. It's a little more vigorous than just seeing a therapist."

"I had no clue. I'm sorry you had to go through all this." Her hair had accumulated more grays, and it was a lot shorter. "Maybe you should come home back to California for a while. Relax."

"No." I answered. "I'm going to go Tulsa. I have custody of Soda and Pony. Before I left, even with all the problems I caused. Darry told me I could always come home. I've never had that before."

"We'll I'm sorry we are so horrible." She said sarcastically. "I have some papers for you. She dug around in her purse. My Aunt Eloise died. You're great Aunt. You remember her?"

"I spent a lot of summers there. Of course I do." I said. I guess now I realized why she didn't respond to my letters for the past three months. She had been sick for a while. I knew it was bad. I just didn't realize how bad.

"Well she left you some stuff. Not much." She slid the papers across the table. "Although I don't know why. I was the one with her when she died."

"I feel awful. I would have been there if I wasn't here." I looked over the papers.

"Yeah. She loved you. She'd bag your Dad and I just to let you stay. You always liked staying way out there. I could never understand it. She always said you were so good too. We just didn't understand you. Holly on the hand hated going there. She wasn't a fan of the hickory switch Aunt Louise kept around."

"Well shit, neither was I." I still squirmed just thinking about it. "God, she used that thing like once a week on me."

"Is that why you were such a good boy over there?" My Mom asked. She wasn't being sarcastic anymore.

"Yeah." I answered.

"Well if beating you would have done the trick; I wouldn't have waster money on everything." That was sarcastic.

"She didn't beat me. She gave me discipline, and the freedom to just be me."

"Shayne, you were out nightly from age twelve on. Doing who knows what, drinking and drugs. We gave you everything you ever wanted. And you put us through hell in return. Then you go off to Texas or Tulsa, and everything is magically better."

"Look, I can't thank you enough for putting me through college. But it was always, always, your way or the high way. You thought if I buy him this, it would just distract him. It took until I nearly got killed and nearly killed someone for you guys to realize I needed help."

"I don't know what you want from us." She said. "I can't figure out why you would want to go from living n the best part of town, to some ghetto in hicksville. You know why I didn't tell you about your father. Because he was living in the clouds, he thought love was just everything. I maybe materialistic, but I only wanted the best for you."

I glared at her. I did the count to ten techniques, I was taught. "What was best for you wasn't best for me. You played some stupid ignore his questions, and it will go away. You have since I was young. You wrote Darrel Curtis out of your life, but I choose to keep him. You can't change the fact, that I'm so much like him."

"You're right, you are like him. You look like him. Your singing is dead on his. Your anger was like his." My head shot up. "You didn't know that did you? The Navy changed his life, but until he was able to channel he has a horrible temper. He had his fair share of issues."

"So, why didn't you tell me? I went though hell because I couldn't figure out why I was like this. Did it not occur to you that he might have been able to help me?" I rubbed my temples trying to get the pain out of my head.

"Did it not occur to you, he is the reason you are like this." She spat back.

"If you want to play that game, then I guess you could say my alcoholism came from you." I sat back in the chair and lit up a cigarette. "You can't blame him for my problems. I didn't even get the chance to know him until after he was dead."

"Shayne, I hope you figure things out. I hope things get better for you." She pushed a stray of gray hair out of her face. I always did have my Mom's eyes. The kind that just looked like at any minute you might cry. "I'm going to go."

"Mom, wait." I stood up. I was angry, but she came out to see me. "If you want what Aunt Louise left me; you can have it."

She smiled. Her teeth were still starch white. She hugged me. "Honey, that's yours. She gave it to you because she saw who you really were. You still turned out to be a good man. Even if I can't understand your choices."

"This isn't your fault, my choices had nothing to do with your parenting either. I love you, Mom."

That was the first day that I had to use tissues in Tom's office. I had begun writing my next story. It surprised me how easy it came to me. I guess when things were built up for so long, the story just sort of flowed.

"You are a popular man today." The nurse said. "You have a phone call."

I looked up at the clock. I had not even three minutes to take this call. It was going on seven. At seven all calls stopped, and all doors were locked. I jogged down the hall getting some looks from the others. "Hello."

"I'm in trouble." The voice on the other line was shaky.

I couldn't make out the voice. "Soda?"

"No, it's Darry."

I nearly passed out. "What's wrong?" The line went dead. I looked up at the clock. Sure enough it was seven. I bit down my lip. It seemed like hell was frozen. Darry never got that upset, and he sure as hell never called me like that before. I ran back to my room grabbed my papers. I ran straight to Tom's office. God, I was out of shape from being in this place.

"Tom!" I shouted knocking on his door like crazy.

He opened the door. "Are you alright?" I knew he was supposed to be leaving. He looked like he really wasn't in the mood for a chat.

"I need to leave. I need to go home. Things aren't right over there. Can I check myself out?"

"Sit down." He gestured to his chair. "We haven't talked about a lot of things."

"Look, I started writing about my experiences with war." I threw my papers on his desk. "One day, when I am ready, I will publish it for the world to see. I know I am going to be tempted to drink again. I know drugs will haunt me. But if I don't leave now. I will regret this for the rest of my life. I'm needed at home."

He used his thick thumb to flip though the pages. "You can leave anytime. You came on your free will."

"Can I have my completion certificate?" I wanted it. No matter how stupid it was; I wanted that certificate for proof. It would be like a reminder when I got tempted again.

"I can give you the ninety day detoxify completion, but you didn't complete all the steps of the program. As for the anger management, I just hope you utilize the tools, we gave you to control it." I could tell by his voice, he didn't think I should leave. He thought I was giving up. I watched him write the certificate. He placed it on the edge of his desk, not bothering to look at me. "Good luck, but I want to warn you, this won't be easy for you. You have a higher risk of abusing substances again."

"Nothing is ever easy." I said grabbing my papers of his desk.


	6. Welcome Home

"I have to go guys. I need to meet Maria." Darry said lacing up his boots. He seemed distance, even for Darry.

We had just gotten back from our trip down town. Darry made me go to the barber, and get the rest of my head buzzed. Soda was officially Recruit Curtis. Things would defiantly be odd around here come June. The house just wouldn't have as much energy. Darry and I were both quite people. The gang would be me, Darry and Two-Bit. That wasn't very many of us. "Where is Two-Bit?" I asked out loud.

Steve and Soda both gave me odd looks. Then I realized I hadn't spoken too much the past few days. They both looked at each pondering. "I don't know. Good question." Steve said. He studied me hard for a second. "You sure look different with that hair."

I knew I looked funny. It was nowhere near as bad as the hair cut that Johnny had given me. I just looked different. I felt like I looked like Frankenstein with all the stitches and the bandages.

"It doesn't look bad. You kind of look tough." Soda said. "The same way Darry does with his hair.

I wished I looked like Darry, but I didn't want his hair. No one messes with Darry, they wouldn't have messed with me if I did look like him. I retreated back to my bed. I was supposed to be there anways. Darry insisted I go with them today.

I couldn't sleep much. Not because of my dreams, but because I couldn't sleep on my stomach. My sling got in the way. I turned on some music. I tried to drift to sleep. The next thing I knew Soda threw the covers over me. He mumbled a bunch of words, but I didn't hear them.

* * *

That was the longest flight delay of my life. I wanted to see my brothers, and I wanted to shower. The front door was locked. I was now wading through the weeds and the mud of the side yard. The house was completely dark, but it was only six. They were probably all out and about. I tried the back door. This door was never locked. The door it's self was a stubborn jackass. Half the time Darry would even give up trying to open it. I couldn't help but curse as I ran my shoulder into the door, to try and open it. I found myself flying into the kitchen with my bags going everywhere. I fell on my ass in the process. Everything happened so fast. Before, I even had time to full realize I had whipped out. I had a gun pointed at me.

"What the fuck!" I jumped to my feet, with my heart beating hard in my chest.

"I thought you were." Pony's voice cracked. He just stood there.

"Ponyboy!" I screamed. I mentally reminded myself that he had been though a lot. Then again, so did I. "Put the fucking thing down!"

Lovely, I was back for two seconds, I busted my ass, and now I was yelling. "Give it to me!" He handed the gun to me barrel first. I grabbed it. It was unloaded; I breathed a sign a relief. Then from the corner of my eye, I caught a look at him. He stood there shaking.

"Oh my God." I stepped closer to him. "What did they do to you, baby?" His bruises were still prominent on his skin. I knew they had gotten him, but I didn't think he would look like rag doll that had been torn to pieces by a dog.

"I'm sorry, I heard the noise and I thought." He just stopped talking and looked at me. He was near to tears. He thought round two was coming.

"It's okay. I'm sorry for screaming like that. Guns make me jumpy." It wasn't loaded, but it bothered me that Pony even had the guts to point a gun at someone. I hugged my little brother tight. "Ponyboy, I don't ever want to catch you pointing a gun at another human again. You hear me?"

He felt his head nod in my chest. "Sorry, I just, I just can hardly brush my teeth by myself. How am I supposed to defend myself if you were an attacker."

"No, one is going to hurt you again. I'm not going to let it happen." I promised. "You know, you kind of look like Darry with that hair."

Pony just looked at me. I could tell he didn't believe me. I didn't have time to say anything. The front door flew open, and in bounced Soda. "You're back!" He hugged me hard. "You look pale."

"I didn't get much sun." I said looking down at my skin. Compared to Darry, he was right, I was pale.

Darry shook his head lightly. It wasn't time to bring up the phone call.

"Are you better?" Soda asked.

"Better than I was." I answered. "It's defiantly good to be back here."

I stepped outside. Sunny was finishing the last of his cigarette. It was a nice night, one of those nights where you could tell that spring was around the corner. "Did you come back because of the last phone call we had?" I couldn't help but feel both happy and guilty that he came home.

"Yeah, care to elaborate about what is going on? I would have came sooner, if I would have known how bad Pony was."

"Yeah, he got Pony pretty bad." I said.

Sunny looked over at me. "What do you mean he?"

"Tim Sheppard thinks it would have to have been one guy." I answered. I began to tell him the entire story about how Tim visited us as the hospital.

"Does Pony participate with a gang?" He asked sarcastically.

"No." I answered.

"Then why the hell would some gang want anything to do with him? You want to know what I think? I think it's just dangerous here. We have gangs robbing gas stations and hurting kids. When my little brother greets me with a gun. Something is wrong. When people have to carry knives, things go wrong. People think it's okay to just carry weapons around, and that is how everyone is getting hurt." He rubbed his temples. I could tell he had probably came back too soon. "I think who ever has been lighting dog crap on fire, and toilet papering the house are a bunch of bored kids. Who ever did that to Ponyboy, wasn't bored, they were cruel. Personally, I don't give a shit what Tim thinks, and I don't want my brothers hanging around him. Including you."

He eyed me. I realized now why Soda and Pony jumped, when he said jump. My brother was terrifying, when he wanted to be. "That night I called you. I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry." I looked back at the door. Pony was asleep. I knew Soda still had an hour before curfew hit.

"What's wrong Darry? Just spit it out." He said.

"I got Maria pregnant." I shoved my hands in my pocket. "I don't know what to do."

A squeal came from his throat. "There is this thing called a condom Darrel! How the hell could you be so damn stupid?"

"We used one every time." I sat down putting my head in my hands. "She wants to go to the reservation. She says they will deal with this better. They are more accepting."

I felt his hand on my back. "What do you think about that? What about marriage?"

"I don't know. I'd feel bad because she would be taking care of Pony too. And this is the house she'd have to live in." I threw my hand back. "I can't help but wonder if the reservation would be better. The house is cramped as is. Not to mention. What about Ponyboy? Soda will be 18. He'll have a full time job." I stopped myself. I wasn't about to spill the beans that Soda would be living on base somewhere. "I don't want to have to drive an hour and a half to see my kid, and her everyday."

"What if I take Soda and Pony. We could get an apartment some place."

"No." I answered simply. "What is the state going to think about this?"

"I'll be honest. They might not like it. A lot of people aren't going to like it." He said honestly.

"Our family is a walking disaster. Nothing can go right, not even for a day." I heard Sunny laugh. I slapped him on the back. "Welcome home."


	7. Chapter 7

"Well well. We meet here again." His voiced grated on my last nerve.

"Hello, Tim." I said not bothering to turn around and talk to him.

He caught up with me anyways. "Got any clue to what this is about?"

"Nope. But I guess we are going to find out." I said as we walked into the principal's office. His office was dull with white walls and brown furniture.

There sat seven boys. My brother, Curly and then some other greaser kid that I hadn't seen before. Curly grinned when he saw Tim. The other greaser kid just looked bored. He had his feet wedged on the wall, and his hands behind his head.

Then there were the four soc boys sitting on the other bench trying to look tough. One didn't look tough; he looked scared. He kept sneaking glances at Pony.

"What's this about?" Tim asked.

"These boys got in a fight." He sat down in his chair. "With recent events with Ponyboy, I understand that some of our children here are scared."

"My son got a knife pulled on him." One of the parents began. "In the lunch room."

"I know that is why everyone in this room has detention and is suspended for the remainder of the day. Ponyboy and Curly, weapons are not allowed on school property. I could call the police, and you boys would be arrested."

"Why don't you!" The same father started again. "They are all going to end up in jail too."

"Watch what you say." I warned. "My brother isn't ending up in jail."

"Yeah, he doesn't have parents to come get him. For all I know you could have been just released from prison." The guy was shouting.

"Maybe if your sons would stop starting shit they can't finish. Our brothers, wouldn't be pulling blades in the school yard." Tim shouted back. "As far as I'm concerned they should have cut your sons up, just like they cut Pony.?

"My brother's parents are dead." I said. "I assure you it won't happen again."

"Let me speak!" Prinicpal Luken said firmly. Ponyboy sunk in his chair. "I'm not getting the police involved in my school this time. Next time, I will." He looked at Pony. "This is me letting you off easy. You got mugged on school property. That needs to be in the past. I can't allow anymore of my students to be hurt. Since you too both pulled knives, you are suspended for the rest of the week. You'll receive a two weeks of detention. When you return from your suspension. I want essays written on why and what you did was wrong, and how you will change it. Please take your children home, and leave my office"

I felt something stab in the pit of my stomach. My kid brother was sitting on a bench with a bunch of hoods. He pulled a blade on someone. He carried a blade. I counted to ten slowly breathing in and out. I felt like my body was on fired, I was the pist off, and that terrified.

I grabbed Ponyboy up by his shoulders. I saw him wince. He didn't have to wear his sling anymore, but his shoulder would still take a while to heal. I had forgotten about it, but I wasn't going to apologize either.

"Asshole took both my blades." Curly mumbled. "Not to mention those socs got off easy, we were out numbered."

"What happened anyways?" Tim asked as we walked to our cars. They were trailing behind Pony and I.

"They threw Pony into the wall at lunch. Nick and I jumped into help. I tossed a blade over, if I wouldn't have a whole table would have joined in."

"We'll get them sooner or later." Tim said. "Well, well city boy. You trying to fit in a little better around here; what's with the car?"

I ignored him. "Get in the car, Ponyboy." I said.

"What it is with you. Those ass holes probably would have given your brother a whole other set of stitches, and your pissed he pulled a blade out." Tim leaned on my truck facing me.

I slammed the door to the passenger's side. "You mean the knife Curly tossed him. Get off my truck, you'll make it dirty." I glared at him. People like Tim were roaches; the only way to get rid of them was to exterminate them.

"I bet Darry would be pretty happy that Curly jumped in and save your brother's ass." He spit. "Opps, guess I cleaned it for you." The wad ended up on the very tip of my tire.

"I'm warning you. Stay away from my brothers, and keep your family away from mine." I said. I meant it.

"Or what?" Tim backed off my car, and stood a half an inch from my face.

"I'll come after you, and when I do, I will get you good." I shoulder checked him as I walked by.

* * *

"I bought some pickles and ice crème. If you want that." I joked coming into the kitchen.

"If I could stop throwing up. I might actually want it. Who ever turned the coin morning sickness should be shot." Maria pinched her nose as she took the onion out of the bag.

"Here, let me do it. They are my brother's anyway. You shouldn't have to cook for them anymore." When I was gone, Maria came over every Tuesday to cook dinner because Darry worked late. Soda had decided to dye chicken pink one time. Nonetheless, the entire family got sick. He has been ban from the kitchen sink since. I started cutting the onions, as she sat down.

"You should just ask Pony to assassinate the guy, he seems to be very good with weapons."

"Oh so that is why he isn't going to be sitting at the dinner table tonight." She smiled raising her eyebrows at me.

I put the knife down and explained to her what happened. "So, don't you start in on me too. I'll be damned if any of them turn out to be hoods."

"I feel bad for him. He is just scared. Darry is going to let him have it too." She said.

"No he won't. We never double discipline. I know he might be scared. But he can't do that. I don't get this. I read this theme he wrote. This crap has been going on long enough. I wish we could just get the hell out of this city. How many people have to have to get hurt and die because these so called gangs are even."

"Believe me being Native American. I wanted to get out too, but not everyone is willing to hire me. Or be nice to me. Sunny, he is still crying."

I turned away from her and started cutting the onions again. "He'll fall asleep soon."

* * *

I was surprised to see Maria's car in the driveway. I almost wanted to turn around and go back to work. I didn't, I walked in to find her setting the table as Sunny finished up the cooking.

"Hey Darry!" Soda said cheerfully. "Listen, I got the last part of the song down!" He strummed a few chords and then grinned up at me.

"Sounds good." I told him. It actually did too, he had become a pretty good musician.

"How was work?" Maria asked putting the last plate on the table.

"It was okay." I answered shoving my fists in my pockets. I was starting to get nervous. I worried the past few days that she was going to leave me.

"I couldn't stand the smell of the raw onions. So, Sunny took over. Want to go for a walk before dinner?"

I nodded. "Only Sunny knows." I said once we were outside.

"We'll have to tell them soon, and my parents." She said.

My hands found my pockets again. "I know." I never thought about telling her parents. Now, I was even more freaked out. "When are you leaving?"

"My lease to my apartment isn't up for another two months." She tucked some of her hair behind her ear.

"Driving out there everyday is going to really suck." I said.

"It will be good thing." She said, her voice sounded more like she was trying to reassure herself.

"What if you moved in with us? You won't have to deal with my brothers, you'll just have to tolerate them. Sunny kind of wanted to move his stuff in the basement. He thinks he would get more privacy to work. The baby could have his room." God, I was so blunt at times. That is not how I wanted to say that.

"I don't know, Darry. Having a baby would ruin what your house is. You have random people sleeping nightly on the couch. Not to mention naked teenagers running around half the time. Two weeks ago I walked in and saw more of Two-Bit than I ever wanted too." She put her hands to her face. "We only have 7 and a half months to figure this out."

"I don't know what you want me to do. I'm not okay with you and my kid moving an hour away. I have priorities right now that are hard enough. I don't want to miss you and my baby." I was getting looks by the people who were outside.

Maria looked embarrassed. She was chewing on her lip, and glaring at me. "Let's tell our families tomorrow. We'll see how they take it."

Maria went home after our walk. I was at a loss of what to do. Either way, there was going to be even more big changes coming to my family. Could a baby even grow up normal in this household? Sunny told us what happened at the school. Ponyboy didn't come out of his room. He has slept through dinner. I was kind of happy, because I didn't feel like butting heads with him. I had to much on my mind.

"Guys it's almost nine." Soda said pointing at the clock.

"Even better reason to get this done." I said yawning. It took both Sunny and I at opposite ends of the table to make sure he did his homework.

Soda stuck his tongue out at me. "Come on, let me at least go talk to him."

"You have to stop babying him. At some point, he's going to have to learn from his mistakes." Sunny didn't bother to look up from his writings. "So just do your homework."

I frowned, I wasn't down right pissed that he pulled a knife out. At the same time, things had been really rough. He was scared. Being the small kid in high school had to be bad enough, but now being targeted. Parents no longer wanted their kids around him. Trouble just seemed to follow him, or so they said."Sunny talk to him. Or I am going to let Soda."

Sunny signed, he tossed his pen across the table. He got up and stormed down the hall.

Soda looked over at me. "Stay here." I told him. I knew he wouldn't stay. He was right behind me as I eased dropped on my brother's conversation.

"Ponyboy, what are you crying about?" I had never heard Sunny use this tone before. He seemed more irritated than usual.

"Clearly, you never had your ass busted before." Pony smarted.

I wanted to strangle Sunny. The kid already had the shit beat out of him. He didn't need it from his own brother. Not that Sunny left him in pieces like the soc had done.

"Knock it off." Sunny commanded.

Soda dropped his jaw and looked up at me. "Why is he being like that?"

I shook my head and continued to listen to the conversation.

"Ponyboy listen to me. You can't act like that. You aren't going to become some hood. You're just kid, you don't want to become hard like that. Why are you crying?"

"It was David." Pony said. He was pretty good at willing himself to stop crying.

"What are you talking about?" Sunny asked, he sounded more sympathetic.

"It's not fair." Pony started crying again. "He was the one who jumped me coming home, He put the blade to my head back when Johnny and Dallas were here, and he tried to drown me that night, when Johnny killed the soc. He was the one who slammed me into the wall today. It ain't fair. Why isn't he getting the crap beat out of him, and stuff? I didn't do anything."

Soda slipped passed me. He jumped on the bed and hugged Pony. "It's alright."

"Why is this kid still at school?" Sunny asked me. "Why isn't he in jail?"

"Because he is a soc." I said jamming my fists into my pockets.


	8. Chapter 8

"You need to cut him some slack," I told Pony. Darry had informed him earlier of Maria's pregnancy. Soda sort of shrugged it off. Pony had called him a moron.

"Why should I?" He asked angrily.

"Because he is your brother, and people make mistakes," I answered shutting down the car. We just got to the market. I had a list a mile long of stuff to get.

"Babies aren't mistakes," Pony opened his car door.

"How's it been, Darry?" I snickered at the mistake.

I whirled around. There was a guy who was almost as big as I was. He was blonde. All the sudden he gave me a confused look. He glanced over at Pony and then me. "Who the hell are you?"

I loved the nerve some people had. Ponyboy ducked behind me. "It our other brother. He's older than Darry." He looked up at me. "That's Paul," and that was all he had to say. I read his theme.

"Good lord, there is two of you," he said. He looked over at Ponyboy. "My cousin signed up for track, it's a shame you can't run."

There was an odd sound in his voice. He was rubbing it in Pony's face. The fact that this guy was picking on a kid was really disturbing to me.

"He'll get there next year," I said. I turned around and decided to ignore him before he could piss Pony off anymore. "We got stuff to do."

When I came home Soda seemed to be in a helpful mood. He helped me make dinner, set the table and clean up after words. I finally looked over at him. He was hiding something. I could tell. "What did you do?" I asked.

"We have to talk." He looked me straight in the eyes and grabbed the car keys. "Come on."

We drove in silence until we reached the graveyard. Never in my life had I ever seen him so quite. He turned to me from the driver's side of the truck. "Sunny, I want to show you Dad's grave," he said.

I hated graveyards, funerals and all that stuff. Death freaked me out. It always has. Just being here made me nervous. "Sodapop, what this about?" I could hardly remember Dad. I didn't want to see his grave.

"You don't believe in war. Dad was proud to serve his country. I'd like to think he would be proud me, since I know he wasn't when I dropped out of school," he began.

"You went back," I said. I had a feeling where this was going. In the pit of my gut I knew.

"Not because I wanted to. I have D's in everything but music and gym. Sunny, I joined the Marines with Steve. Darry signed for me." He didn't speak fast, or string his words together. He usually did that when he told us something that we didn't like.

It would be hypocritical if I got mad. I couldn't help it. "Soda, you saw what the Army and war did to me. This isn't a movie, this is real life."

"Yeah, and not everyone has and experience like you. Dad loved being in the Navy. Let's face it, when I graduate, I'm not going to college. I don't want to be stuck here all my life. I want to see things, and I want to do something good. I want an adventure." He wasn't looking any where but my face. I wondered if he had grown up in the three months that I had been gone.

"Well, you are going to get one," I said. I couldn't believe this. Of course Darry would sign for him. All my brothers had a rally around the flag attitude. "I'm not happy about it Sodapop." I wasn't going to lie to him.

"Well I am, you could at least be happy that I'm happy." He dug his shoe into the ground. "I can't always make all of you happy at once. I have to piss off someone." He had anger in his voice. I dwelled on his last words. Soda would always bend over backwards for us. Even if it meant doing things he didn't want too. All he wanted was us to be proud of him.

"Shit, if you figure out how to make us all happy at once then you must be a miracle worker. Soda laughed a little. I punched him in the arm. "Look Soda, they will try to change you. I'm sure they will in many ways. Just don't let them take anything away from you. Don't loose sight of who you are."

"I won't," he said. He leaned forward and hugged me. "This went better than I thought."

I grabbed him by the shoulders and looked him straight in the eyes. "If you play hero, or do something stupid, and end up in this place before me. When I die, I will come find you and beat the hell out of you. Understand me?"

Soda grinned really big. "I don't think you will be able too. See, I'm going to heaven."

"You're a little shit." I shook my head, "Do me a favor, next time you want to give me news or talk, do it anyplace but here."

* * *

"Want me to take over?" I asked. Darry was sitting on the couch with Ponyboy watching late night TV. It was almost two in the morning. Pony was having nightmares. Darry shook his head and glared at me. He was still mad about the other day. The fact was, Pony needed to be held accountable for his actions. He was getting to big to throw a pity party for. Darry just didn't understand why I was so cold.

I slid next them on the couch. "You have to be up in the morning. Let me stay with him."

Darry rubbed his face. I could tell he was beat. "Don't get spooked if Steve or Two-Bit wonder in drunk," he said.

I had no clue why he insisted on warning me about things like that. I mean, I had lived here long enough, I knew people wondered in at night. "Alright kid, it's me and you," I pulled Pony close. I began to hum Blue Moon. I had no clue when I drifted off, but when I woke up. I heard a swarm of laughter from outside followed by a stream of cussing. I would never forget that voice. I got up so fast I nearly knocked Pony on the ground.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Tim Sheppard looked up at me. He was higher then a kite, and drunk as could be. He stood there holding the running garden hose. I walked out to shut off the water. "Fire," he said looking at me like I was a moron.

I looked down to see what was left of our American flag. "What the hell? The flag was attached to our house, not a flag poll. The entire house could have went up in flames if it wasn't for Tim.

"I saw some socs drive off in time," he explained. He stumbled back wards a little bit. "Fuckers got away."

"What's going on?" Darry asked. He and Soda were standing at the door way.

Soda's eyes met the charred flag. He looked between a mix of sad and confused. "Who would do something like that? Dad put that up years ago."

He pushed passed Darry and picked it off the ground. "I don't get it. Was it a anti war protest?"

"Socs did it. I saw the white car," Tim said. "Darry, I need to crash on your couch."

"Sure," Darry moved out of the way so Tim could get in.

"We have to burn it now. You have to burn flags when the touch the ground," Soda said.

I wanted to smack him upside the head. Did he not get how serious this was? "Soda, who cares about the damn flag! They could have caught the entire fucking house on fire! With us in it! If Tim wouldn't have been in the right place at the right time."

"Sodapop, go inside," Darry ordered. "Just go."

Darry's eyes were darting around the porch. He was freaked out too. This wasn't just a bunch of teenagers lighting dog shit on fire. This was serious. "We need to call the police," I said.

"For them to do what? Act like it's a joke again. I think Soda and Steve have the right idea. We need to wait up and find out who it is."

"Then what happens then? Huh? You all go into another rumble knock each other around until someone wins, and then this starts all over again!"

"Sunshine," Darry screamed on top of his lungs. "Someone or some people are targeting our family! Did you not see Ponyboy? I'm not standing around and letting this happen."

We were lucky we lived in a shitty neighborhood. If we were anywhere else, the porch lights to every house would have went on. "You've got to be fucking kidding me. You guys rumbling with socs is what got us here in the first place."

He stood hardly an inch from my face. If it were anyone other than me, they would have been scared to death. "Go to fucking hell!"

We were both fuming. This wasn't good for me. I lost it. "What did you just say to me?" I was shouting now. My voice had nothing on his. "What makes you think you can talk to me like that you bastard?"

"Knock it off," Soda said. He and Pony slipped between us. "Come on, we don't need this!"

Darry just glared at me. "Stay out of this."

"No, don't fight like this. Not now," Soda said. He was pleading at this point. If Darry was going to listen to anyone, it was going to be him. He turned around, and walked inside slamming the door shut.

I looked at Soda. "Make sure that thug is off the couch in the morning."


End file.
